1 year done
Last year on the 1st of February I encountered a book that changed suddenly my perspective on how I was feeling about life. It was an incredibly challenging time. All the possible insecurities and fears emerged over the 12 months preceding….feeling so unsafe, so vulnerable, so lost but mostly so unloved, unwanted and purposeless.
Whilst browsing the Whitworth museum shop in Manchester, my eyes landed on a diary with the title ‘One line a day’ a curiosity emerged. And some words whispered within …. ‘I am not sure if I can commit to the idea of life, but I can surely commit to live other 5 years for sure’. I felt that suddenly life reduced to edible bites, step by step and day by day. Only few lines a day seemed so manageable and so I committed to it.
Who would have thought that Covid 19 was ahead of us; who would have thought that it was going to be the most revolutionary year ahead presenting a separation, a reunion, a loss of freedom to travel and many lockdowns. I am so grateful that I had this little friend to capture glimpses of life, glimpses of death, glimpses of transformation. There were time where I couldn’t wait to get up to write about the days before and other where I forgot about it and had to catch up for up to 10 days straights, strolling through whatsapp messages, photos and emails just to regather what a recent period felt a different era. At times I recorded simple list of events, others emotions and feeling, others a big question mark or left it blank as I was figuring out how to answer the question: what is important to note down here…. what would I love to read in 5 years?
Now I have arrived at the 1st of February 2021 and so, from now on, I will be able to read what I noted the exact day the year before. The first entry of this new year is full of life, love, friendship, creativity, playfulness and there is a travel in it as well: between Berlin and the place I call home at the moment. It will be interesting how this will change what I decide to record. I am surely learning what I take notice of, what stays with me, what I deem relevant and important. A process that feels generous and expansive. I am filled with curiosity about it.
This book was the best gift I ever gave to myself.